plz talk dirty to me
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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