she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
