I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize