would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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