I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
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