Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
