whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
