well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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