butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize