well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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