Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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