I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I wish you could order shots online.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
