Swine flu. Run for my life!
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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