almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
