It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
