i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
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