Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
