She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
