I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize