Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
