she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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