Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
