Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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