some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Randomize
