absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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