at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
