he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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