just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize