thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
