I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize