I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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