I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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