Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
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