I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
