brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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