Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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