...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
