I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
you never un-have a 4some
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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