Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
from now on my penis is your penis
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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