How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
