its not stalking. its research.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
