I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
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