just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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