you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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