He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
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