It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Randomize
