Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
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Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
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My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize