You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
