My pussy is not your playground.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize