sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Randomize
