In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize