I heard we made out
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
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She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
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Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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